Creative Writing with Sarah Seidelmann

Author, Sarah Bamford Seidelmann, joins Rainbow Raaja and shares how Creative Writing has contributed to her spiritual practice and quality of life.  Rainbow discusses the powerful impact Sarah's newest book, "Where the Deer Dream" had on her. 

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Transcript

0:10

Hello, hello, hello and welcome to rainbows rising where we ascend together. I'm your host, Rainbow Raaja shaman and life coach. And today, I have just a really cool author. And she's not just an author, she's a shaman as well, she was guided to write this book. And I'm so glad she did, because the book that we're going to be talking about today, how to very large impact on my life, when it entered my life. So I would like to welcome Sarah seidelmann. Thank you, Sarah, for coming on. I'm so grateful that you made time for our show today. Go ahead and tell the audience a little bit about yourself and your journey. Yeah, thank you so much for having me. Well, and I'll share the book too. The book that we're talking about is where the deer dream. My let's see my journey. Well, it's a little long journey, right. But I would say the most significant thing is about 12 years ago, I was a practicing physician. And for the, you know, the years coming up to that I'd started feeling disconnected at work and not as engaged in what I was doing. And I realized that not being engaged in what I was doing wasn't such a great thing. You know, I was a pathologist, which we sit in, you know, stare into a microscope all day looking, you know, hunting for disease, and sometimes, you know, you're looking at 100,000 cells and trying to find six or seven, that might be problematic. And that yeah, being disengaged was not a long, long term solutions. I ended up taking a sabbatical to kind of explore what it was that was going on with me. And in that sabbatical, it turned out to be pretty radical. As I did a couple of things. I entered a coach training, and then somehow stumbled into this path of shamanism, this path of spiritual healing. And it started with I ran into a book Ted Andrews book, which many people have animal speaks or something like animal speak. Yes, thank you. And the book, I was like, This is crazy. This guy is saying that wild animals have messages for humans. And I was just like, my mind was kind of like, but at the time, I was very, in a difficult place. You know, it was kind of in that dark woods that we all go in the hero's journey, didn't know what the hell was going on. I'm like, why don't I want to be working? I'm supposed to keep working till I'm 65. Like the plan was for everything to work out so great. And as a kid, I'd absolutely been, you know, freakishly Slyke loving wild animals. And so I thought, I don't know, I was just like, let's just look at this and just give it a try. Like, what have you got to lose? You have no better ideas right now. And as I read that book, I was like, wow, I just started to apply some of the principles of it. And I was just like, astonished it's kind of like the whole world open to this other aspect of like a wonder part of life kind of reopened to me maybe that aspect that as children we have, but it kind of slowly goes away as we get more and more rules, like put on us. responsibilities, responsibilities, yep. Trying to behave ourselves trying to be staying in the corporations or the institutions are trying to make a living at whatever it is. And anyway, as I kind of started listening to these wild beasties, you know, I realized eventually I gotta figure out who my main these days because it seems to me like as I started to read more and more about this shamanic path that people tended to have one particular beastie that was their helper, their, you know, kind of confidant. They're almost like their spiritual bouncer, their guide, you know, all these things. And I was like, I don't know, I gotta figure out who my mind is. And so I endeavored to go on a shamanic journey, which I did, which is sort of you know, you just for those of you who've never done it, you just listen to a drum beat that this particular drum beat which is, you know, drums have been around for 1000s and 1000s of years. It alters your consciousness, it changes your brainwaves into tend to go into a theta brainwave state, which is that Twixt in between brainwave state we see in rapid eye movement, or dream sleep. Anyway, I did this drumming, listen to this drumming track. And I thought, well, I just gotta go see if I can find my beastie was supposed to help me because man, I can use the milk right now. And on that journey, I met this mother bear and she just sort of took me aside and rub my back and she was extremely loving, like loving in a way that I had a very loving family but I'd like and never experienced that kind of love before. It was just very intense and very light without limits. And she's like, you know where you're going. It's not that far away. And I know you're upset but you know, just she kind of showed me that it was down Hill, like all I had to do was kind of keep moving down hill and it was going to kind of like downhill wasn't like climbing up a steep mountain, and that it was going to be okay. And I felt a extreme amount of relief after that journey. And I thought, well, I don't know what the heck is going on with me, like, I'm either like starting to have a mental breakdown, or maybe this is a breakthrough, you know. And so I started to continue visiting her. And as I did, I began to learn a lot of things. And I got, it just started to feel a lot better. And that was sort of the beginning of my journey. And eventually, I I, a few years later, I abandoned medicine, traditional medicine altogether to really fully step onto this path of spirit. And simultaneous with that article, I started to write and I know we're going to be talking a little bit about writing today. Yes, um, I got this strong desire, like the key seem to come out of nowhere and write a book. And, and, anyway, and so, just started writing. And I think looking back, I was a huge reader, as a kid, as most writers are, most of us who are writers tend to be obsessed with books. And I certainly was. And I wasn't a writer, though. Like, I didn't write in my journal every day, you know, it's like, I didn't know Elizabeth Gilbert, or some of my favorite writers was like, they knew they were writers at age eight. They're like, that's what I'm going to be. So there was a little part of me that was worried that maybe I wasn't really supposed to be doing this. But I found writing to be a really powerful tool, spiritually speaking, for myself. And I don't know if I should I just, yeah, talk a little bit about that.

Yeah, I mean, what's what's really so great about writing because I, myself, am a writer, not a published writer. But I have like three books that have over 100 pages in them, and I'm just sitting on them. I get to a point where I'm like, I don't even know if this book is good. But, and then I just come back to it, like a year plus later. It's, it's, it's a, it's it's hard completing a book, though the energy comes and goes, the inspiration comes and goes like a wave. And it's just when you get those moments of like, I need to write, you really should just go sit down and write. That's, I mean, that's, that's what I found to be the key is like, if it's 2: 6:37

30am, and suddenly, you're like, gotta write my book. Don't like, don't go to bed. Just go do it. I know, it's like, super unhealthy, because I have the worst sleeping schedule because of it. But following those little intuitive pushes, especially like I have, I have really bad attention span issues, kind of ADHD stuff. I'm also diagnosed with ADHD. So you know, we're like, suddenly, you'll be like, I feel like painting. Wait, I didn't finish that. But I don't feel like doing that anymore. Now, I feel like writing Wait, I did like 25 pages in the past three hours. But I don't I don't want to do that again for a really long time. Right? Yeah, it's a struggle. It's a struggle. So how did you push through the waves? Because that's yeah, you know, like, like, with surfing, you got to ride the waves, but also, you also have to kind of utilize the, you know, you have to know how to complete it. And that's where I'm at. I'm at the how do I complete it phase? You know? Yeah. Well, a couple of things about writing books, because I've written six now. And it's just like, I kind of know hard, you know, there is a lot of hardness, you think? Well, the first thing I would say is like, we don't do these things alone. So like getting some whatever support you need, which for me meant like asking friends to read things asking, hiring and like an editor or developmental editor, asking them like having a session with somebody to be like, I'm trying to find the organization for this book, for example, because I'm very creative. But I kind of need this somebody to help me maybe make an outline or maybe figure out like a format, especially for a nonfiction book. This book for where the dear dream, this felt like the how this came to be was years ago, I got a review from a newspaper on another book I had written and she said, Man, I'd love to read this author's a book of hers. That was fiction because her imagination seems so you know, amazing, and it was really sweet compliment. I thought, Wow, you think I can read a fiction book and I was thinking I've never thought about writing fiction, but I ended up buying this journal. I don't know if you've seen that. I'm sure most people have seen the books that are like wreck this journal by name. This was the author cat carry. It's like a visual journal where you sketch on it, you write on it, and she had a book called the imaginary world. And it was where you wish you remember last name right now, but anyway, you go and you kind of create an imaginary world then I was thinking like, what if I could make any world what would I make? And that's kind of where it started. But this book for sure, as I started to work on it, it was when I would reach challenging points, I was like, I just can't do this anymore. Like, I don't know how to proceed, I don't know where the story is going. I was just, you know, like, frustrated. And then I'd also like, lose all faith in myself, I'm like, maybe I'm not supposed to be doing this. Maybe. Yeah. And then like, the craziest stuff would happen. Like, I would put it down for a couple months. And I remember the last time that happened, I was at this, I was at Seattle SeaTac airport in the downtown, like the parking garage looking for an Uber. And I run into this woman who's a stranger. And for some reason, you know, we end up having to talk. And she starts telling me something that is so tied to this book, like a one in a million chance that anybody in the Seattle SeaTac Airport is talking about the thing we're talking about. And I was like, I knew in that moment, like spirit is this is this is saying, like, you need to get back and finish this book. And even though I dreaded going back to it, because as you know, probably like how, when you put something down, it's very, it can be very intimidating to pick it back up again. Because all those stories and those voices in our head, like You'll never finish it or you don't know what you're doing or whatever they are, they're really loud. But it kind of felt like and by then I also felt very connected to the the hero in the story whose name is Mira. And for those of you I'm gonna I imagine a lot of your listeners do communicate spiritually with, you know, journey to, you know, shamanic Lee or have spirit animals or helping you guys haven't, you should check out the episode journey to lower world and journey to upper world meet your spirit guides and spirit animals. That was back in season one and two, you guys go? Awesome. There you go. So there's no excuse not to go? Well, one of the times so when I'm working on a book, the other thing I do is this idea of not working alone, I go and ask my spirit helpers for for help. So I have this one spirit that I visit, who's a spider and I went to her and I was just like, I have no idea how to continue this on. Like, I'm really struggling. And you know, I'd gotten some feedback, some for some readers, and I just I knew it needed to be better, but I wasn't sure how. She said, Would you like to meet the character? Mira? And I was like, Yes, I would. And then all sudden, she came in this journey. And we got to like, hug. And I mean, I could talk to her and ask her these questions like, well, what? What do you how do you want this to go? And you know, what, what do you think about this, and, and then suddenly, it felt like not finishing the book would feel like I wasn't really honored to her. Yeah. And though she isn't like a living breathing, like a friend, but she feels like a friend now. And it feels like it was just an honor to complete the book. And for her and, and I just really, she moves me. And it's like, I've heard people like actors say, Well, I pictured this character for six months. And I felt very close to them. And I was like, Wow, that must be interesting. But now I kind of understand that, like, it's like, for a while that that character is in your life. And yeah, she inspires me a lot, because of what she went through and how she dealt with it. And I think that's what, you know, my art my painting teacher because I like to paint also says that everything that we paint is really self portrait. And everything we create, there's another quote that the potter becomes his pot, which I love that because then if you write a story, or you paint a painting, it can be really a neat way to for ourselves to grow and change and also to maybe have more compassion for ourselves and to become stronger and more courageous and more willing to face life on life's terms. I, I completely relate with all of that. I know my characters, if I sit and I'm not writing my book long enough, they literally will come and harass me. Like I can hear them talking. And it's intimidating, because it's like, but I don't I don't know if what I've written is any good. Because I don't like a lot of my friends don't read like fantasy. So it's like, Who do I get to read fantasy? Hey, listeners, if anybody wants to read my fantasy book, just kidding. But um, you know, it's like, I know that they're out there. They're multi-dimensional, like, spirits or something. It's like writers and artists are tuning into these frequencies in these different energies. And I I think that saying that they're not alive or whatever I think they are because I can feel it. I can feel the aliveness of my characters. And there are times when I'm sitting down to write and the way that they're dictating what I'm writing just based on their their actions and how they're moving and how they're talking. It's like, not something I would write at all. It's like so far away from my personality so far away from where I would have taken that book. And it's funny because I like wrote down the entire, like the entire story. When I was in seventh grade, I was like, here's the story, this is it. And then as an adult picking that story back up, and I was like, Okay, I got like, 60 pages into this book. This is amazing. I should write more. And then suddenly, the characters are like, changing the story. I'm like, but I have my notes right here. Why are you guys doing this? So like, that's not where it's meant to go. And I was like, okay, so I do I really am, you know, I really connected with Mira myself. I'll go ahead and share with the listeners kind of how, how I met you and why I brought you on as a guest. And all of that. So, we connected through a mutual friend out in Santa Clarita. Right? I used to live in Santa Clara. And now I live in Seattle. And UFC TAC, right? Um, you know, that's an interesting thing. But, um, so so she connected us because she was like, oh, yeah, I think this would be a great guest. And you went ahead and sent me your book. And I'm just gonna be honest, when I got that book, I was like, I'm not gonna have time to read this. There's no chance I've got two kids, podcast clients, I can barely keep up with my own stuff as it is. But time allowed, I don't know how I don't know. I you know, I went on this trip. And I brought the book with me, but I had already gotten myself 100 pages into your book at that point. It was so magnetizing just your story, I connected immediately with the first couple of pages was about how this girl is really into interior design. My mom's an interior designer, so I related to all of that. And then, you know, like, I don't want to do any spoilers, you guys, right? It's tough right now. I'm not gonna spoil anything. But just know that, I mean, would would saying saying what she's going through be a spoiler, like, isn't that kind of main plot II, I kind of feel like, yeah, it's like she's going through this, she's kind of we had some kind of medical thing going on. And as all of you listeners know, and those of you don't know, last year, at the end of the year, I got diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. And I went into kind of a depression grieving period. Because in order for you to accept things, you have to grieve, and have this, this moment of like, letting go of what you won't be able to do, and this acceptance and like kind of lowering your standards and stuff. So I had to do all that. And this book came into my life at that time. And there was a lot of parallels with how this character was feeling with what she was going through and what I was feeling and what I was going through. And there was a lot of parallels with my family members and her family members. And it ended up that this book kind of became a guide for me. And I ended up taking initiative, to see certain things and to do certain things and to like, interact with certain healers, because of this book, and it was very liberating, and calming. And it was, it like held my hand through my grieving period of acceptance. And so this book was profound for me. And it's right on the border of like, I'd say, like a young adult novel, and an adult novel, like the girl in the book is young, but she's extremely relatable as an adult reader. So I just want to let anybody know who like starts to look at the book. Just know even though she's a younger character, she is extremely relatable. And I encourage you guys to check out Sarah's book where the deer dream and just so you guys know the book, its cover is so soft. I don't know if all the books are like that, but you chose I don't know what you chose, but it's so soft. For like sensory people. It's nice to touch is well and I love it's just so there's nothing better for an artist to know that somehow something you created, whether it's a painting or a piece of jewelry, or a piece of writing or a poem that it touched somebody's life it's like that's why we do what we do I think because it's that's what art can do for people it's like it moves us you know, we feel things we understand things or we see how things could be different and we you know, like how many of us read Eat, Pray Love and when Oh my god, like I could go somewhere I could go, I could take myself somewhere and by myself alone and try to figure out what's going on with me whether, you know, you end up going to a town for a weekend away, or whether you actually went to India, you know, doesn't really matter. It's just that inspiration that I think women, you know, we needed that, you know, that invitation. So I'm so grateful. Thank you so much for sharing that. And it makes me feel like writing you, that's a like, I don't think a lot of people appreciate books much anymore. But books, they, they do what movies, I think, initially were meant to do, which, which is to take you into the mindset of these other people. But I think TV and movies has created an A like, like a disconnect in some way. Because I get so much more intertwined in the characters and books and intertwined with the story and the energy of that story than I do watching TV shows and movies. Like, they're, it's a different feeling. It's a different sensation. But I mean, I remember times in my life where I was so unwell book, I refuse to sleep, I would take the book to eat, I would be walking through hallways at school carrying that book with my nose and running into walls, and I couldn't put it down. And like nobody could get me out of that book, I'd be reading in class instead of doing the work. And I mean, there was very little that could keep my intention that long. But good books shirt. Good. And I think we need more writers expressing themselves and more writers sharing stories from their hearts, even if they if they're like, I don't know, if anybody's interested, like there'll be one person, at least one. Yeah, and it's like, I think the beauty of books is that they, it's not read by any one person in the same way. And so the way your mind sees and the whole imaginary world that it creates, that has your characters in it are unique to you. And you're gonna be like, yeah, it's such a personal experience. And I can relate like, oh my gosh, I have to be careful. Like if there's a book that I will get into the mood of the book. So if it's a really bad book, I it'll make me I'll be kind of out of sorts for days on end, especially if I'm really into it. It's like I become part of the book and that that I'm, I've learned as I've gotten older to be careful about that. Because, again, it shows for me, like if I I used to watch shameless, and like oranges, the new black and like those put me in moods, I'd have to do shields before watching them, I'd be doing my energy shields and like, Okay, keep energy separate, gotta stay like in my own energy field and keep that stuff. I cannot watch anything with serial killers can't watch any, like, some people are really into that stuff. I can't do it. It's just, it just makes my skin crawl. And it makes me like really not nice for several minutes. I read some a quote once. And I don't think this is totally true. But I think it's a little and sometimes a lot true that watching TV is like spraying black paint on your third eye. And there's a lot of good stuff out there. But it's like, yeah, don't forget to engage your imagination. And I think that's where, yeah, whether it's writing and writing about your dreams or writing about your life. That's where Yeah, spiritually, that can be Yeah, I think it's just a powerful practice to know ourselves, you know, and to really explore what's going on with us. I wish I would have done more of that, you know, looking back that would have been more helpful for me, but I like you, I was, you know, crazy busy life with kids and working and didn't have a lot of time or did decide that I didn't make writing a priority. But I find is I process things with writing or when you know, in the process of I wrote a memoir, years ago, and in the process of writing that and I was just listening to Oprah interview, Viola Davis about her memoir, there's something that happens when you write your stories, whether it's you know, what happened to me today, or what happened to me over the last 20 years, you're really going to process that and understand yourself and really connect to who you really are and, and fall kind of back in love with yourself. I think as you process and inform you know, I don't know there's something that happens. It's very empowering. So I think writing it's good to you know, just let yourself express yourself on paper. You can say the things that yeah, maybe you don't want to say to your partner or your mother or your father or whoever it is, you know, you can get it out. I actually started working on my memoir like literally maybe a month ago I got over 100 pages in already. Oh that's so exciting. It is but also I'm you know, writing it down because I like tried to break it down. In an IME I was like, I'm gonna make this a really inspiring book, right? And as I'm getting in, I'm like, Oh, this is so heavy. This is so dark. My life was so depressing. What, what, what? And I'm kinda like, how do I lighten this up? And, you know, I feel like it's important to put all that in so that people really understand. You know, like, where I've come from, and what I've transitioned through and like, really, like all of that struggle. But also, it's a lot, I was like, Man, I should put some, like, some disclaimers, like here and a disclaimer. Well, in some ways, it puts you back into re experiencing those experiences, like beautiful good things, but also the terrible awful things. So I feel like it's also a time to reprocess and what I did a lot of that kind of writing where I was like, Oh, this is Xad was like that. But then he asked myself, like, what is it that I want people to understand from this? Like, what is it that I want them to know? And what did I what do I really have to say about all this? I mean, I'll just keep going for a couple extra more chapters, like get past all the Drudge and then you get to the inspiring part, right? Because, you know, when you're in the thick of it, and you're going through all that trauma all over again, you're kind of like, gosh, I just want to quit this book. And in that period of my life, I just wanted to quit it life. And so I'm like, no, just keep going. Going. Yeah, yeah. Well, I'm I'm just really impressed with like, the fact you've written six books, and I took a look at your reviews, like your books are really well received. I don't know if you've been, like recognized by any big, big things yet. But it's, you know, yeah, I've got so many kind people that have, yeah, that we've laid, like I found an audience, you know, maybe not a gigantic audience, but people that my work resonates with? Well, I can tell you, I'm going to be reading more your books, because they definitely, they, that one book hit me so hard. And it I saw ripples of it in my life afterwards, which is really rare. Like you can read a book and feel connected to the story. But it's another thing to actually see connections, see the synchronicities and see how that is panning out in your life. And last month, we actually talked about synchronicities and signs and how you can incorporate those in your life and utilize them as like a conscious universe manifestation tool, right. But like your book really was that sign from the universe that I needed to sit and like, read this book and focus on myself and process all of these feelings. And that there was that I didn't have to run away from these feelings, that it's okay, I'm a healer. And I can feel the grief of these, you know, things, but kind of bringing it back to writing, bringing it back to like, your experience and what you have to share with like, I know you you do workshops and stuff for for writing, and helping other you know, novelists and writers find, find their voice and find their confidence moving forward. So if if there's any writers out there, you know, what are some tips? Or what kind of guidance can you give them so that they can, they can feel confident writing and understand the value of why it's important to write your story or to write these creative stories that, you know, help create worlds, right? Yeah. Well, this year is the first one I've done a writing course of the past this year, I ran a course with and it's still ongoing right now with another author, friend of mine coach, where we helped people to get their book done in 2023. So there's a lot or 2020 22, because there's a lot of people that have a dream to write a book. And maybe they've started and stopped and started to stop. And we were like, You know what, let's all let's harness the power of social connection. Because we know Research shows, like, when we do things together, it's like we feel more empowered, and we feel more supported. And so we but we wanted to launch a group that was really different where there wasn't like we were reading each other's stuff and critiquing it because they're writing groups like that. And neither one of us wanted anything to do with that. And I think the biggest things that you know, we just say that anger and I just say that, like you're gonna feel so good and so much integrity with the industry. Golf when you write this book, and every time you work on it, you're gonna feel better because it's something precious to you. It's something important. It's something that on your deathbed, if you don't get it done, you are going to regret it. Like some of us know that, like, this is something I keep avoiding. And even though it's painful, I gotta do it. Yep. And so, um, I guess that's what I would say. And I, we also talk about like, don't worry about like, some people get worried about like, Oh, my God, I gotta get famous first, and then I'll write the book, or I've got to get a booking agent, and then I'll write the book, or I need 10,000 followers on Instagram, and then I'll read the book. And we're like, listen, Charles Dickens did not need 10 out, you know, thank God, he didn't go around going, I need 10,000 Instagram followers before he started writing, or, because that's madness, because we're living in this amazing world where we can now publish beautiful, you know, self publish beautiful, like, professionally, professional looking books. No, um, with all the technology that we have. And if you if you do have a desire to get traditionally published, of course, you can pursue that, and I've done both tracks. But I think the main thing is just just right, like, make the time, take the time. And do it and like, I guess what we've learned from our writing group, a lot of us are moms, with some of us with younger kids. And it's like, sometimes that means like, just writing while you're in line, you know, waiting for drop off or writing down your ideas for 20 minutes after the kids go to school before you go to work, you know, and there's just like fitting in time for this, this precious project of yours. And we talk about a lot about Yeah, just putting it on the schedule, like you do everything else. Like most of us as women, we're like we prioritize our kids, our partners, you know, like cleaning the house, whatever, you know, like getting the laundry done. But what if we treated our writing, you know, and put it up there on the priority list? Yep, right beneath putting the kids to bed. So you sit down, and you write right after? I mean, I can tell you, if I sat down for an hour after putting my kids to bed, I'd be done by nine. And then it would be like, I'd have an hour every day of writing my book would be done in what two months? You know, depending on how long it is. Write 100 pages. I mean, that would be done in three weeks less than that, if you count editing. But yeah, I mean, people don't realize I timed myself on, I set a timer for 30 minutes to see how many pages I can get done in 30 minutes. In 30 minutes, I can write seven pages, which means that most people can probably write at least three if not more, you know, that's a lot of pages. You chalk that up, you know, 14 pages per hour. That's a chapter. It's a chapter you guys. Yeah, some people write books in a month. I mean, there is a there's a thing in November called Nano Remo like National writer novel month, I think that's the right acronym I can't remember. But everybody, they again, harnessing that power of the group. And it's free, I believe you just dedicate yourself like, I'm going to do it. And there's a lot of support, and everybody's doing challenges. And like we do a lot of things in our group where we will get together on Zoom. We'll go okay, we're gonna write for two hours right now. And we don't really everybody just says really quickly, like one minute, this is my intention, boom, we go away. But it's that knowing we're all sitting here, but in share working on our books and ability partners. Yeah. And it helps and it makes it so much. It's also fun. Because when you're connected to people, it's so wonderful to be in the company of other writers, because only or other writers understand writers, you know, like, what we go through how challenging it is and how fun it is and how delicious it is when you really get into it. Because usually, once you start writing, it's fun, or it's at least really engaging and you feel things and it's moves you you know, of course, you can have those hard sessions to where you're like, nothing's happening, what's happening, or you get halfway through and you're like, what was I doing? Like? What was the purpose of I can't remember what I was doing with this scene, or this character. Wait a second. Let me go back a couple chapters. Yes, I always have to read my chapters before I sit down. I don't know if that's normal. Is that normal to have to like reread your own material to like, a lot of writers? Yeah, a lot of writers plan their writing every day that the first thing they do is reread what they've written the day before or the you know what they read the last time they wrote, because it gets in that space. And for fiction writers There's a wonderful book out there called the snow if you if you don't have this, I highly recommend it. And I used it to help me design the the plot for where the deer dream because he Oh, it's a wonderful book, and it's called the snowflake method for fiction writing. Just Just Google and you'll find it on. It's fantastic for anybody who wants to write fiction and wants to write like something that's going to really make people turn the pages like how do people do that? And it's a fun, really fun written in a silly kind of sweet way, but very powerful. I appreciate that recommendation. I will be putting links down below for both Sara's book and the snowflake method. So, yeah, so besides writing, you know, fiction and all of that you're also a shaman, right? You do shaman stuff? I do. I do shamanic mentoring and I do shamanic practitioner work. So I do like shamanic healing sessions and divinations and things like that, too. So yeah, like, Why didn't fit in with your practice? Like, how do those connect, because I noticed there, there is a bridge in your, in your book, a very solid bridge, it's like your, your passion does, like follow into your writing. But like, what does what does writing bring you like? What, what do you get out of writing? What what does it bring to your practice as as a spiritual, healer, person? You know, I don't? Well, I, you know, when I do spiritual work with individuals, like individual sessions, I don't do any writing at all in those sessions. But, um, I do a lot of writing. Like when I do my own personal work I write a lot about when I go on a journey and asking the questions I'm asking, and what am I struggling with? And what did the spirits Tell me about that, like, I do a lot of writing about that for just for myself, but then I will tap into that, because when I write my newsletter, every, you know, couple of weeks, we can have two weeks, I will share stories from that, like, this is what I've learned and and that seems to resonate with people. Because you know, we all maybe my story's a little different from other people's, but they can relate to struggles that I'm having. So I use it a lot in my creative work. And I just love words, like, right now I'm doing this thing, okay, I was, we're gonna do 100 Day project that's coming up, which is called creative soul retrieval. We're all going to design our own personal projects, and then create everyday for 100 days, like spending 15 minutes a day no more, unless you really want to. When I was, I've been thinking about what am I going to do this summer for my project. And I read, I watched an interview of David Bowie, and he was saying how he wrote much of his original music. The lyrics was this way, he would take things that he likes that were written, so poems, essays, whatever different content, he would print it out, and then he would cut it into a million pieces, just the words, and then he would rearrange the words and scramble them up. And basically, he was making lyrics out of these words, so and I just like that, it sounds so fun. So I took a bunch of Anne Lamott assays and some have fees, poetry, like things, I just like sources, I like to get high on, you know, these beautiful artists. And I've been making found poems. So just using the vocabulary that's in there, and the inspiration. And that's been really fun. And I just love how a simple combination of words will just make you feel something or think something and, and it's fun to do. It'd be a fun project to do with kids. Like, if you've got kids, I would think, you know, like, just chopping up an old book that you get at Goodwill and like, let the kids make their own sentences or make their own story. I do. I have a couple found poems. Yes, of course, magazines have been great. You don't have to destroy books. That's probably a bad thing to say to destroy books, but there are so many cheap books. Luckily, there's no children listening because do not get up. I'm struggling with my two year old right now who she's like, I love books. And then she's like, Yay, rip books. I'm like, no, please stop at the library book. At the library out for a while because it was just too hard to find those books in my house. Oh, I'm having that trouble. Right now. I'm about two days past due because I haven't been able to find one or two of them. I'm like, where they go. They're in somebody's bookcase. Under somebody's bad. But to go back to your question of like, Where does writing fit in? I feel like I am one of those people who's like a multi passionate, whatever you want to call it. I call it born to freak because I feel like we're all just here to like, you know, eccentric ly express all our weird gifts in order to rebel into the world and, and so I love to be able to write one day and then another day I'm doing shamanic healing and another day, I'm helping somebody to learn how to connect to their helping spirits and watching them like develop that relationship. And to me that's, that's really fun to be able to hop between these different things in another damn painting. And yeah, that's me. I've got one day I'm making a drum and I'm painting the drum another day and painting a picture and then doing like several client sessions and oh, by the way, I'm going to go skiing tomorrow. You Yeah, I get it I get it beautiful way to live you know, I think it's it's also chaotic because there's no order and routine and that's that's been really my biggest struggle is the routine even with like routine of writing and just like sitting down and getting it done. That's been that's been hard. Yeah, I think it's following my flight of fancy has been my it's a gift a blessing and a curse all at the same time. I think ironically like that's what I've learned as I've gotten older is like, though I am born to freak born to freak people actually benefit from having fences in their pasture. So I do have like a morning routine so that the most important things like praying for me and like texting my sponsor and a 12 step program and you know, talking with my husband doing some push ups for get cop, like I do some push ups, just doing these little things, but it's like maybe a half hour, 45 minutes sort of set of things I do. But with those things, I feel like well, I've gotten some of the most important things out of the way and it helps me to it's like that little discipline and I hate to I hate to say that word because most of that that makes most of us want to run screaming but Oh, discipline is so important. It's it's routine and organization that I want to run from, but discipline. That's what I need. That's what I strive for. And I luckily have developed that in this podcast. Hey, everybody. We love doing it. And so it's easy to discipline yourself to it. I think that's that's the beauty. And like you were saying 30 minutes. Wow, what if I wrote row for an hour? What if I wrote every day for 15 minutes, at the end of 365 days, ladies and gentlemen, you would have and non binary people, you would have a lot of writing versus saying I must go to a mountaintop and have a you know, six week writing, you know, fellowship or something. And it's like, most of us that's not realistic, but 15 minutes can do that. Yep. Yep. And it's, it's, you know, there's so many places in our lives that we could take that time to, right. Like, I'm sure everybody has a, you know, time in the bathroom. I mean, we've we all have our phones, let's just be honest here. Like, you know, it sounds gross. But we all have our phones in the bathroom. I know this, I know this. So there's one phone, if you don't like typing, talk into your phone. That's what voice memos were made for. Yeah, and public, it might be a little awkward. But, you know, I type I just do the little swipey thing. And I wrote the first like 25 pages of my memoir that way, I just was sitting at the DMV, and I just went ahead and did it at AT AT AT AT I had a memoir start. And I was like, Oh, I guess I'm doing this. That was after reading your book, too. That's so amazing. I mean, that's the thing. It's just being open to it and not worried, you know, like what it all means. But just being willing to be that conduit, I kind of think of it too. Like, these books, these things, they don't really belong to us. But we're the ones who have to be willing to let it come through us. And it's just, I think of it as like the spirit wanting to come out and show people things and point at things. And in, we just have to open up to and be willing. I agree. I know, I know that the characters in my books, they have messages and like specific lessons they're trying to teach like, they have these these certain points. And I'm like, Oh, I know, that's a message. I know, that's a message. I know, that's a message. And it's really tuning into those characters, whether it's yourself and like realizing that a call to do like a memoir is a call to heal and to let go of all that junk that you don't need anymore. As I was writing my memoir, and I got to like, pretty much I just made a chapter specifically for like bad stuff, because I just didn't want to fill my book with a whole bunch of bad. So I was like, let's just get all the bad people out of the way in one chapter. And I was writing it. I was like, I feel like I'm meant to like vomit this into this book. And then me be clear of it. And for that to be a reflection for other people to like recognize themselves and to recognize what they need to heal and, you know, to process their own healing through me. You like I don't know, disconnecting or like severing that attachment to those experiences. Does that make any sense? Yeah. So yeah, so it doesn't define you anymore. It's just what happened and and kind of embracing all that. And then I think Viola Davis was saying in this interview, it's like returning to that. Then she showed a picture of herself at like eight or nine years old. You know that precious pure who we really were at that time because that's who we are you know, and it's like, kind of yeah, get it letting go of all these layers and stories that aren't true. Or we believed we were failures because this happened to us or we believe we were damaged, you know, beyond repair, because this happened to us. And yeah, and realizing no, were a hero, we're still standing man. And we've learned a lot of people. I mean, as dark as that is, like, I have a lot of friends who did not make it to where I am. That their, their struggles were too much for them to handle. So I have a lot of gratitude for my own resilience. And I think sharing my story because I've kept it to myself, I once in a while, drop a little little bit into the podcast, right? But it would be really nice just to like, let it go. Yeah, just like in frozen. Let it go. Let it go. Is the reason that's it? Well, you know, I hated that song. Until one day, I was really like, my kid was throwing a tantrum, put her in a room and I was like, like, steaming over. I was like, let it go. Oh, no, I understand son. Let it go. This was for the moms. I was like, let it go. Okay, all right. This makes sense. Yeah. I think that's what writing is, you guys. I think it's it's letting it out letting it go letting you know, maybe all those for fiction writers, it's letting those characters like have have their space have their reality, like you're creating a reality for them. I've always believed that television shows and books, they have a reality. Like, it's not just us. It's kind of like we're gods, right? And we're creating our creations then have their own lives. And we are observing and we become their god kind of thing. sounds really weird. But like, I believe everything has spirit. And if we're the creators, and technically we're the God, right, like not not trying to be like, God, I don't know you. Yeah, I think of it as like, we're the hands and feet of God. And so yeah, the things that we make are like mothering them made us in His image, right? Then here we are making television chosen books and all these art pieces with all these little people and like maybe they're in their living their reality. And we're just, we're just there as like the ones who gave them the energy in the form. You Yeah, and I think they help us feel less alone when we experience them. Because we see ourselves I mean, it's all ultimately the self reflection, which isn't that what the creation is anyway, they say it's, you know, God reaching out to like, experience him or herself itself. Yeah, the universe experiencing itself. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So, yeah, we we went real esoteric. gonna be awesome. Well, um, thank you so much for just coming on the show and talking about your process and talking about your your books. And I just want to once again, circle back around and encourage everyone to go and check out your book, where the deer dream because it like it really did have an impact on my life. And I want to be able to share it with others because I think it would benefit other people and give them a little bit of reflecting, you know, not reflection, but retrospection on, like where they are and show them some gratitude for things they've got going on. Yeah, and if anybody reads in says, Man, I'd like to have a book club with some of my girlfriends. And you know, I always love coming to people's virtual book clubs. It's been a lot of fun for me over the years, so just contact me through your website through my website, if you're interested in doing something like that. And I'll be leaving that down in the link below. Everybody, go check out the description. Um, so yeah, thank you so much for coming. If you have any parting words or parting wisdom, you know, please, please share, do you have anything coming up that you want to share with, with the listeners coming up, I have the creative soul retrieval, which I think our first gathering is May 15. So it's coming up pretty quick, but we're going to start our projects June 1, and that's going to be powerful in a lot of fun. And then I guess the I would just say, like, what I what I you know, I was a disease Hunter paid for all those years and what I really was curious about what makes people well, and what I think makes people well is dancing, singing, telling stories, making art, like expressing ourselves and that's what we're here to do. You know, One of the things we're here to do, and I think it's what brings vitality in life to our lives. I agree, I think creation, in whatever form is, is the secret to longevity and like living a high quality life. I am so grateful for my life and I, I create constantly. I've made my whole practice on, you know, I'm healing and art. For those who can't see me, I'm being a dork. So, yeah, well, thank you so much, once again, for coming on. And for anybody who wants to connect with Sarah, please check the links below. And I'm just really grateful to have you on the show. Thank you. Thank you for having me, Emily. Absolutely. All right, you guys, share this episode if you enjoyed and subscribe so that you can continue to get the updates and to go on this healing journey with me next season. Well, that's it for season five. Thank you guys so much for tuning in each and every week. I encourage you guys to go back, listen to some of those older episodes. And really start doing those practices as much as you can learn and grow and keep ascending. Thank you guys so much for joining me for season five. And I want to end this season with a challenge I challenge you guys to go and write go and write whether it be 15 minutes per day like Sarah recommended or even more even more is great. I challenge you to go and write your story whatever that story is. Thank you guys so much and I hope you have a wonderful rest of your day Bye.